Today I'm at 11 weeks, 4 days. I heard the heartbeat today and actually got to record it! Such beautiful sounds, of horses thundering down my path, of an ocean on overdrive, waves lapping 160 times per minute. The doctor found it immediately, comforting me to the very core to know our little acorn is still hanging on! I have had no pregnancy symptoms (besides tender breasts) since a few weeks ago, but my waist is starting to thicken to the point of removing my spanx half way through the day because the pressure was getting noticeable. And I have gained a bit of weight, between 2-4 pounds, but I think I'm okay with it. I just look chubby right now and I'll have to find alternative means for my pants as the most comfortable position right now is unbuttoned.
Everything is going along so eerily smoothly that it's hard to trust it. But I do. I trust that our hard part was getting pregnant and now that we are in that car, it's going to be a low-maintenance, smooth, and beautiful ride. And so I don't have much else to say. It's funny how my long-winded rants have come down to a brief update, but I think that's expected. I have used this forum to release my noxious pain into the air, to let it dissipate and set me clean. I've used it as a dumpster, to throw out those painful memories, hoist every frustration and annoyance over the lip, and watch them get hauled away.
Now that I am eerily calm I don't have much to pine over, to wish for, to be jealous of, to be sad about, to be frustrated at, to be depressed by, to overcome. Now I just have grateful peace. It's quiet here now, deep within and all around. Just Ryan, our little acorn, and me, together. Content and excited. Peaceful and pumped. Thankful and gracious. Our first trimester will be over next Sunday. I can't believe how time has flown! I am so thankful for a mild first trimester, for not too many scares (except unnecessarily so in the beginning), and a wonderful start to our next phase. God bless our pointed little heads!
To think, I thought this was a belly! Hahahaha!